Q&A With In & Out sex writer Debbie Herbenick
There are over 2.8 million single or taken men and women living in Chicago and its surrounding neighborhoods. Within that population, a vast majority take part in the throws of passion or one night stands. To them, sex is sex. But what happens with something goes awry and sex is no longer sex but becomes an aspect of life that leads to unanswered questions and complicated relationships?
Doctors can only answer so many questions before the patient becomes uncomfortable. After all, who wants to talk about a flaccid phallus with their doctor? That is when one turns to a sex columnist to ask the questions that should not be asked, unless they are anonymous. Thankfully Chicago has its own sex-pert. One who will go to any length to answer those deeply penetrating thoughts of yours. Meet Debby Herbenick–a woman not afraid to get down to the hot sticky details.
Herbenick has been writing the In & Out sex column for the past 3 years at Time Out Chicago. On a weekly basis Herbenick receives numerous emails and letters from sexually frustrated straight, single, gay, lesbian and everything else men and women.
I had a chance to chat with Herbenick in order to get the low down on Time Out Chicago’s own Sue Johanson, except Herbenick is younger, sexier and most likely more approachable.
Before getting into this Q&A interview, I would like to ask one thing, mostly for all the gays reading this. Are you a Carrie Bradshaw?
Oh god no, but I am always compared to her by my friends for being a Bradshaw wannabe. Believe me, I’m not. Though I do like the show. The difference between her is that she writers about her and her girlfriends having sex, I just answer questions that are related to sex. But both of the columns can get pretty graphic and witty.
Did you like the movie?
I want that wedding dress.
Don’t we all.
Okay, where did you go to school?
I graduated from the University of Maryland College Park with a degree in Sexual Health. After that I went to the Kedzie Institute, where I still work, to further my sex knowledge.
Where was your first column?
I started writing for Men’s Health Magazine a few years ago by lending my expertise on men’s sexual health and from there I discovered a rather unique love for writing…about sex.
How do you get all those answers in your column?
I try to keep up with what is current. That involves reading a lot of studies and books that come out every year about sex. And believe me, there are a lot of them. There is sometimes I don’t know the answer or answers to the questions in my column, so I have to do a little digging for the right thing to say.
Obviously you are a women, what do you think when you get questions from the other gender, or even the other sexual orientations?
I love getting questions from all backgrounds. People decades older than me trust me to give them answers to their questions. I have even had a younger demographic, the youngest I think was 13, ask me about sex. It is rather empowering and an honor at times.
Ever get emails responding to your advice?
I actually do get feedback, and it is always a feedback saying thank you for the advice and that it helped. That is the best feeling.
Anything else you want to say?
I have a book coming out next August called “Because it Feels Good,” it is going to provide people with quality information on sexuality. There is a general lack of information concerning sexuality and the internet does not help because who knows what is accurate. This is going to be a fun book for people to read. That and email your sex questions!
Believe me, you will be getting some, questions that is, from me. I got some good ones.
